Dear Twitter,

Dear Twitter,

In the archives are several diaries, journals, and scrapbooks that document former students’ time at Denison. These days, things are a little different. Students share their random thoughts on Facebook, Pinterest, and Twitter, and they’re certainly not afraid to let the world know what they think about anything, from the Republican caucus to fur-lined Crocs. One Denison student summed up her Twitter feed this way: “My twitter is essentially just a deranged journal of my life.”

So what might a whole academic year look if it were boiled down to student Twitter messages? As we pored over public feeds, we realized that though the students use a different format to record their daily musings, and observations, some things never change. Here, a sampling of Denison Tweets from 2011–2012, beginning with the first day of class on August 26 all the way up to Commencement. Consider it a not-so comprehensive (and very random) year in review—in 140 characters or fewer.

August 29th: 7:06am

“It’s my first day of class at @DenisonU as an upperclassman – so excited! Creative writing, comm, phil., and Arabic!”

August 29th: 11:54am

“so far teachers are demanding at least 3hrs of work daily. And get 6-8 hrs of sleep. Professors are divorced from reality.”

September 30th: 3:10pm

“class discussion on plato, socrates: inconclusive”

October 11th: 2:19pm

“Fall break ready. #restandrelaxation:

October 27th: 9:59am

“I walked up the hill today and was on time for class. I don’t know who I am anymore!!”

November 6th: 3:25pm

Dear Twitter,

“i spelled illiteracy so wrong that spell check didn’t even know what i meant and then i cut myself with the irony #englishmajor”

November 16th: 3:21pm

“paper update 2011: successfully opened Microsoft word and typed the header time for a 30 minute break #procrastinationmaster”

November 25th: 5:24pm

“I would rather get a shot to the arm than watch my mother type out a text #painfullyslow”

November 28th: 3:20am

“If the ppl below me dont turn down their tv within the next 25 secs I will poison their water supply and prolly not even feel bad about it”

December 1st: 11:44pm

“thinking about flying across the country to have 3 extra hours to do my homework”

December 4th: 11:07pm

“i wish i still lost teeth i need the money #broke”

December 5th: 4:26pm

“Attractive man in library, wearing crocs, loses attractiveness by 100%”

December 11th: 7:28pm

“Writer’s block and country music.”

December 12th 10:45pm

“It’s really heartbreaking to forget to put in the detergent when doing laundry”

December 15th: 9:02pm

“Rowdy in the Roost”

December 16th: 11:36am

“Wellp, #greekciv exam over. *wipes hands off*. That went just about as well as I could expect it to. #meh #sallgood”

January 1st: 11:36am

“It’s going to be a great year #justlovinglife”

January 6th: 10:37pm

“are fingernails a carb?”

January 18th: 7:35pm

“Reading the Federalist Papers (kinda) redeems my prospective classics major…They love them some Pericles.”

January 23rd: 2:04pm

“Dining services demonstrates full range of sycophancy for days that faculty/staff come to Huff #denisonproblems Handdelivered mints? Really?”

Dear Twitter,

February 6th: 9:16pm

“100 pages of poli-sci reading over Superbowl weekend?? #cruel and #unusual. I know my rights!”

February 14th: 12:24pm

“nearly hit my roommate with snowball. #todayisagoodday

February 14th: 12:47am

“I’m supposed to study classical music now. How am i going to listen to soothing things & not fall asleep”

February 16th: 8:58am

“Listened to recording of last surviving castrati singing in class today…there’s a gravitas joke here but i’m not going for it #TooEarly”

February 22nd: 8:24pm

“The one thing about reading Foucault is that you always learn new words. i.e. my interest in procrastination is #polyvalent.”

February 23rd: 7:59am

“Im the George H. W. Bush of scheduling. How many times did I say#readmylips: no 8:30am classes. & here i am, miserable.#hoistbymyownpetard”

February 23rd: 1:23pm

“The more i learn about a complex issue the less easy it is to take a position. Is this the way it’s supposed to be?…damn postmoderns”

February 26th: 11:31pm

“GO DENISON. #liberalartsrivalries#mysmallliberalartsschoolisbetterthanyoursmallliberalartsschool”

February 27th: 11:18pm

“Naked Week: CHECK #seniorbucketlist…”

February 28th: 8:47pm

“no more fun tonight. now to more pressing concerns: is the institution of the presidency good or bad for democracy#polisciproblems”

March 4th: 2:27pm

“I wonder if watched facial hair grows faster…”

March 6th: 1:00pm

“Just found out I have $72 flex dollars, its just like christmas! Who wants a Gatorade? I’m feeling generous…”

March 3rd: 3:31pm

“WHAT IF SHE DOESN’T MEAN SHE LIKES ME WHEN SHE SAYS SHE LIKES ME?! LANGUAGE HAS NO MEANING!”

March 17th: 4:18pm

“Back in Ohio with only 6 weeks to go? #WHATTTT??? #gettingold”

March 19th: 12:20pm

“All I want to do is lay out on a beach til graduation. Or the IM fields. Either would be fine #senioritis”

March 24th: 9:58pm

“I’m pretty sure Sunny B has NEVER been this quiet on a Saturday night. Ever.”

March 26th: 9:55am

“hearing about the housing lottery makes me feel old. and surprisingly sad. #seniorproblems”

March 27th: 6:06pm

“I love how @DenisonU I can spend a morning class talking about rocks and minerals and an afternoon class discussing Foucault#liberalarts”

Dear Twitter,

March 29th: 12:37pm

“I complain about ohio a lot but could be indiana #perspective”

March 29th: 4:23am

“Wait, it’s not friday night? Whatttt?”

March 29th: 9:50pm

“after graduating high school being sick does me no good anymore”

April 4th: 5:16pm

“like 90% of the ocean remains unexplored and you’re telling me mermaids don’t exist!?!?”

April 6th: 2:21pm

“Freshman ‘star crossed lovers’ in the arena. We know its all for show, he’s an econ major, she’s a philosophy major. It could never work.”

April 16th: 9:19pm

“To the couple canoodling in the hallways of Ebaugh: please stop. This is a center for chemistry but not that kind of chemistry. #PDA”

April 17th: 7:40pm

“Let’s go to Mexico”

April 22nd: 1:27pm

“I just saw someone driving with the top down…That seems a little ambitious.”

April 24th: 9:32am

“Presentation…in Classical Music today. Crowd was WOWED into silence and apathy #finals #lolclasses”

April 26th: 4:02pm

“Currently my iPhone says it’s sunny and 65 degrees. Um, no.”

April 28th: 11:56pm

“Good thing I have a 15 page research paper due tomorrow. Otherwise I wouldn’t have any incentive to be awake at 4am for the Royal Wedding.”

April 29TH: 4:33PM

“Turned in my last college paper and my last day of school is tomorrow. For some reason, I’m not okay with this.”

April 20th: 5:25pm

“Senior symposium done. BOOM!”

May 2nd: 3:00pm

“Why am I studying in the place with the best view of campus? #cantconcentrate #sentimental …”

May 3rd: 10:57am

“Sunbathing on the @Denison_DG patio. What finals?!”

May 13th: 7:34pm

“We will meet again Camp Denidoo! #alumnistatus”

Published June 2012